The Symptoms of Codependency, Conclusion:
Not all codependents have all of the above symptoms.
The question is how did we get this way? Prolonged exposure to oppression is the key here. After all, oppression damages our self-esteem. As Earnie Larson states in his books and lectures: “What we live with we learn; what we learn we practice; what we practice becomes habit; our habits have consequences.”
All of these behaviors are “learned.” They can be unlearned.
Everything boils down to this: We have little self worth; our happiness is found outside of ourselves. We, the codependent, must DO something to initiate healing. It won’t come from outside. It just doesn’t happen. If nothing changes, nothing changes.
Codependent behaviors can be stopped. Therapists, books, support groups, and constant and careful self-monitoring will help. In the end, healing from codependency is ultimately up to the individual…The first and most important thing for a codependent to learn is that happiness is inside of us, not something outside.
As adapted from the Wellness Directory of Minnesota