Few couples ever expect to find themselves in divorce counseling. In fact, most marriages begin with a spark, a bang, and a great deal of affection. This happy phase rarely lasts, and once the marriage itself begins to set in, many couples find themselves struggling with the commitments required from this kind of long-term relationship. Small issues that were never really a problem start to create conflict, which is when couples should seriously consider getting marriage counseling. We believe that it is never too late to start marriage or divorce counseling and take a shot at saving your marriage. It is important to remember that despite all the frustration, this is the person you love and wanted to marry in the first place.
There are many things that take a couple down the road to divorce, some of which can come out with divorce counseling. Before we ever get to talking about divorce, there are a few fundamental questions you need to ask about the efforts that you and your partner have made with regard to working on and saving the marriage. These are things we will talk about in divorce counseling as well, so it is best to be prepared to face some hard truths about your own level of commitment and ability to fight for what you love.
Divorce counseling typically begins with a simple question about you having tried to fix the marriage. The first thing you, and we, will want to look at together is if you and your partner have done everything in your power to fix what is broken. This includes, but is not limited to, the following:
Communication: It is beyond critical in any marriage that you communicate. Silence, grunts, or long periods of keeping emotion locked inside can only lead to frustration. Being able to tell your partner how you feel, what you like or dislike, in a non-hostile manner could result in changes that make the marriage bearable.
Identify Conflict
Every marriage has things the couple disagrees on. These can be mild, and sometimes they can be severe. In either case, during divorce counseling, you will need to identify what those things are. Identifying areas of conflict is a three-fold process; first, you have to be willing to share your thoughts, and then you have to be willing to listen to your partners. The third step is working to make it not a conflict by eliminating certain things or behaviors.
Seek Divorce Counseling
If you are struggling with a marriage and are considering a divorce, you should seek counsel from somebody outside the marriage. Sometimes things can be resolved with the help of a great counselor. The introduction of a third party may be just what the two of you need to help shed some light on your issues and help you to work through them.
Keep in mind that divorce is rarely easy. It takes a toll on you mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. So if you are planning on getting one, it is wise to seek help first.