Here’s Part 2 of my own personal strategies for raising tween and teens:
Activate Your Inner Advisor
My third strategy is that I activate my inner adviser. Your inner adviser is that voice or that imaginary creature that sits on your shoulder and it whispers really wise, mature advice into your ear. It encourages you to take the high road in moments that maybe you’re considering taking the low road.
So, when Oriel and I are really getting on each other’s nerves, and I can feel my temper starting to flare, I might look really composed on the outside but internally I’m activating that inner adviser. And it’s saying a little bit something to me like, “Angela! Do not engage. You know you were about to lose your cool with that child; walk away and let it cool off. Don’t say anything you regret. Come back to it later if you need to.”
The really cool thing about following the advice of that internal wisdom is that it leads to parenting interactions that you don’t regret. It allows you to parent with integrity and it prevents you from making matters worse with your own emotional upset.
Do you believe raising tweens and teens has to awful?
Fourth and finally, I refuse to buy into the popular belief that raising a teenager is awful. There is that common attitude out there in our society. And yes, it’s challenging at times, even scary on occasion. However, my fourteen-year-old is also one of the most interesting and fun people on the planet, in my opinion. Based on how quickly the first fourteen years of her childhood have flown by, I live with the awareness that she will be moving out of my house before I know it. And I have every intention of enjoying as much of the time that I have left with her as possible.
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