Are you retired and no longer satisfied with your marriage? If so, consider marriage counseling and how it could be helpful. We work with married couples in all stages of life and find that when major lifestyle changes can create tension within a marriage relationship. A marriage is heavily influenced by a couple's normal routine.
A disrupted routine
Within a household, there are unspoken routines, rules, duties and expectations that married couples and families learn to live by. For example, there may be an expectation that one person is going to take out the garbage and the other is going to make dinner every Friday night. These expectations tend to evolve over time and are based on maintaining the same or similar routine.
When lifestyle changes occur, they can disrupt the natural routine and change everything. This can lead to unforeseen conflict within a marital relationship. Fortunately, we can help couples adjust to these lifestyle changes and create new routines that work for everyone.
The best of intentions
Sometimes, conflict and marriages happen when one person has the best of intentions but does not communicate what they are trying to do or why. For example, we find that when some of our clients retire, they suddenly wish to invest more time in and help with other matters pertaining to family life.
This sudden interest may include running errands, cooking, entertaining or organizing. However, this help can sometimes seem to be more like interference. This can lead to conflict within the relationship that neither partner expects. For example, if one partner normally plans family gatherings and the other steps in to take over, it can appear as interfering and unwelcome assistance.
Unfortunately, these small and simple changes can lead to a great deal of conflict. This makes it important to schedule an appointment for marriage counseling and to begin learning to communicate more effectively to prevent this type of unnecessary conflict.
More time together
When couples retire, they also have more time together. This can be a wonderful gift. It can also lead to conflict as a couple tries to establish a new dynamic where neither is leaving for work and their entire day is spent together.
We can help couples identify ways to help ease this transition such as remaining involved in the community, volunteering, taking a class, etc. We can also help couples to identify some of the things that could cause strain in their relationship when spending time together and learn how to minimize them.
Change can be good
Change is not always easy but it can be good. Retiring is an opportunity to enjoy life in a whole new way. However, if this change has caused tension in your marriage relationship, do not delay in scheduling an appointment for marriage counseling to ensure that it can be a positive experience. We are here and ready to help, so make your appointment as soon as possible.